The Dark Ranger: THE TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS

Bio of TDR

TDR is a working professional in entertainment and is obsessed with the game of hockey. More fourteen years ago, this site emerged as a means (or an outlet) to tell some truth'isms about the game post-lockout, rather than the crud fed to us through knuckleheads like Jimmy Dolan and his lemmings universe. Today, there are a hundred Rangers sites and is thankful and grateful to all those that have come after him, but honorable thanks go to his fellow Dark-writers, Graying Mantis and J_Undisputed. And "Let's Go Rangers!"

Bio of General Ganz

General Ganz is a cynical yet well-informed student of the human spirit. He's a professional of sorts, with a post-graduate education, some experience working in real companies, and some limited athletic ability. The total small package. He got picked on a fair bit as a kid, and he experienced his first human-non-relation kiss in his teens. He also grew up on the other side of the tracks, thereby helping to cultivate a healthy contempt for dreamers and optimists whose rosy upbringing gave them something to smile about, even when "life produced lemons." Like it or not, his only mission is to point out the potholes you're lucky enough to miss on your drive to work. To find the blemish on your daughter's carefully-stitched (and not-yet-paid-for) wedding dress. To take that little smidgen of hope that your favorite hockey teams fill you with, and pour orange paint on it. Oh, and he is a Blueshirts fan, and takes most of his fashion direction from Ron Duguay (whose name he dropped as a way to close the deal on that first kiss).

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

THE TORONTO MAPLE LEAFS - SOLD

If we had it our way....

Pretend Press Release October 14, 2009,

Based on the worst start in The Toronto Maple Leafs Franchise history, Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment has sold the team to Jim Basillie for $425 million dollars. Mr. Basillie has agreed not to move the team out of Toronto and the Air Canada Center. The Toronto Maple Leafs will be re-branded immediately with a stronger name and attitude. Mr. Basillie "will do whatever is required to straighten out the sinking ship"

"I'm so excited to be a part of a winning franchise once again. No more living in the past 1967 - it's about the future for this Torontonian. I can sleep well this evening knowing that we are now officially the center of the hockey universe.

Here is the new logo for the NHL team in Toronto."

What do you think?

tdr

5 comments:

AnonymousWednesday, October 14, 2009 2:57:00 PM
hThis is a crazy story!
It would cost 500 million

BlueNationLeafs
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Graying MantisWednesday, October 14, 2009 2:59:00 PM
I would put the classic leaf logo on the sleeves.

I have my pen ready to sign any jerseys. ;)
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Toskala Pajama PartyWednesday, October 14, 2009 3:09:00 PM
Thanks for that Dark. We hate you to begin with, but this made me laugh. Avery stills sucks pucks
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Doctor AlexWednesday, October 14, 2009 7:48:00 PM
i wouldn't be too surprised if your 'fake' press release becomes reality within a season or two, the way the leafs are playing. it's a pretty sad situation!
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The Dark RangerWednesday, October 14, 2009 10:32:00 PM
A win will turn things around, but more of this and Burkie and the people around him are going to lose confidence...if that happens, then you're really in trouble!
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